I was really saddened last week to learn that Al and Tipper Gore had separated after 40 years of marriage. I’m not really sure why the news of their marital difficulties and estrangement hit me like it did. You would think that in a culture of disposable relationships, starter marriages, and a running storyline of extra-marital affairs among politicians and celebrities that the Gores’ announcement of separation wouldn’t have created a blip on my radar screen. But, for some reason, it did.
Maybe it is because they have been married for four decades and there is no initial indication of “another man” or “another woman” in the equation. Maybe it is because they seemed so committed to one another and had successfully journeyed together through circumstances that undoubtedly tested their relationship in many ways: numerous political campaigns, life in the U.S. Senate, the Vice Presidency, and narrowly losing a Presidential election. Maybe it is because they endured the trauma of nearly losing a child when their six-year-old son Albert III was struck by a car in 1989. Maybe it is because of “The Kiss” at the Democratic National Convention in 2000.
This isn’t about politics. It’s about a fractured family: a family with four adult children and precious grandchildren. It’s about an American family. Remember those? Not red state and blue state families; just American families.
Maybe it is because Kim and I have worked through struggles of our own over the course of 22 years of life, marriage, and ministry together. There was a time when we were told that we just needed to “start thinking about what was next” by people who were prematurely ready to throw in the towel for us and apparently believed that we were beyond help and beyond hope. I pray that the Gores are getting wiser counsel than that.
Al and Tipper, I never voted for you, but I am definitely praying for you and pulling for you. I pray that your separation will give you time and space to remember and rekindle the things that caused you to fall in love over 40 years ago. I pray that your hearts will be healed and drawn back to one another so that you can grow old together and enjoy your grandchildren together. If anyone tells you that it’s too late for that, they are wrong.
Thinking Out Loud 
5 comments
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June 7, 2010 at 8:00 am
Kim Pyles
They were wrong weren’ they? Thank you for this sensitive post. It’s always sad when a family breaks up.
June 7, 2010 at 8:41 am
Kristine
Well written Tim! Marriage is one of the hardest things we’ll ever do. All good (GREAT) things are worth the extra effort! 🙂
June 8, 2010 at 10:49 am
Loran
I too am shocked and saddened about the Gore family because it’s not that often you hear of a couple parting ways after 4 decades of marriage. It’s obvious the pilot light in their relationship has been extinguished somewhere along life’s journey, and I’m sure there are a myriad of reasons to lay fault.
I and my wife Holly have been married for 22 years and like the Gore’s and many other couples we too have had our peaks and valleys in life trials, but we have never given up on our commitment of LOVE for one another.
Many years ago before becoming a Christian and getting married, a friend of mine gave me a poem that said “Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous … ” and so forth; author unknown. I thought to myself what a beautiful and elegant choice of words to ponder upon from time to time. Well, this poem became a favorite of mine and I kept it close to my heart because it had special meaning at the time, but eventually it faded from my repertoire of personal possessions never to be seen or thought of again.
Several years later after becoming a Christian and getting married, I was studying my Bible when I came across 1 Corinthians 13 and behold the love poem from years back suddenly and unexpectedly reappeared. The poem I once cherished was found again however with a new sense of meaning and purpose, and to this very day it is part of my life never to be lost again! Why? Because it was no longer just a poem that someone thought of and wrote on a piece of paper, but rather it was the living and holy inspiration of God.
My desire and prayer for all who are in relationships is to reflect upon scripture often, particularly 1 Corinthians 13, and try to understand how He would have us live our lives according to His will. Simply put; without God we have no light or sense of direction to the path of fruitful works and righteousness, therefore how can we have, know, and share love if we do not truly understand God’s love for us? (1 John 4:7-12)
Brother Tim; I want to say thank you for being a minister who truly touches my heart with your thoughts of wisdom, insight, and understanding from the words of God. I look forward to your sermons each week as well as your blog post in hopes of growing closer to Him through your personal inspiration. May God bless you and your family for all your good works in leading and teaching others about Christ.
Your fellow Sojourner
Loran
June 8, 2010 at 2:00 pm
Tim Pyles
Thanks, Kim & Kristine!
Loran, thank you for sharing the personal story of your discovery and rediscovery of I Corinthians 13 and for your words of encouragement! It means a lot to me, and we are very grateful to have you, Holly, and your children here at BA.
July 30, 2010 at 3:32 pm
Kristi Byrd
I’m late in commenting but I, too, was saddened by this news. Forgiveness is such a powerful thing; it’s no wonder it is mentioned so often in God’s Word! Phillip and I have both had occasion to embrace forgiveness throughout our marriage ( most recently my dear husband has graciously forgiven me ). I can honestly say, however, that experiencing this forgiveness has made God’s love all the more real to me. Life and our own choices can definitely throw some challenges in our way but my marriage to Phillip has still been one of the greatest blessings in my life. It makes me humble and so grateful to God. Great post, Tim!