I wrote the following paragraph in my October 13 post, “Back from the Brink”:
“A year ago today, I was at the lowest point of my entire life. The days were dark, and I felt like there was a weight on my heart that would crush me. I had questions about my physical and emotional health, my future in ministry, and my future, period! From a human perspective, there was no way forward. I cried out to the Lord like I never had before; and, often, I just cried. I was spent, with no strength of my own to offer. My tank was empty and my well was dry.”
I remained in that depth of despair until one year ago tomorrow. That was the day when God began to reveal His answers to my prayers and when light began to appear at the end of the tunnel. It was the day that hopelessness lost its suffixes! I still had a long way to go emotionally, and I still had absolutely no idea what I was going to be doing in the coming months and years, but I knew that I was going to have my family along for the journey. November 6, 2008 was the third-happiest day of my life, after the day of my baptism into Christ and the day that Kim and I were married! Through tears and prayer, Kim and I knew that we were going to be okay!
For nearly 22 years, Kim and I have shared our lives together as husband and wife. I can’t fully describe the blessing that she has been to my life. She is a natural protector, nurturer, and encourager. She is a champion for the underdog, the marginalized, and the disenfranchised. From the day that Hannah was born, I knew that Kim was intended for motherhood. When our lives were additionally blessed by the birth of Coleman, she met his diagnoses of Dubowitz Syndrome and autism with unyielding resolve and determination that have resulted in countless open doors and opportunities that he never would have enjoyed without her tireless, tenacious advocacy. She has done all of this while suffering long bouts of fatigue and frequent pain associated with lupus. She has challenged and encouraged me in my ministry, and has sometimes had to offer loving rebuke and correction. I could not and would not have continued in full-time ministry without her blessing and support.
During those “dark days,” Brandi Carlile’s song, The Story, really connected with my heart. I think it was a combination of the emotion of the lyrics and the passion of Carlile’s voice. The refrain states, “But these stories don’t mean anything, when you’ve got no one to tell them to. It’s true; I was made for you.”
I love you, Kim!
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November 5, 2009 at 7:01 am
Kent "Grumpy" Smith
God bless you Bro. I love you, and I miss you.
November 5, 2009 at 7:46 am
mwilloughby
Kristal and I were privileged to be a part of your journey of recovery culminating in the joyous wedding vow renewal ceremony in your house last Christmas. That ceremony was one of the happiest moments of my life as well because I knew that you and your family were going to be OK. God is indeed Good. Hold on tight to Him and Kim.
We love you and we miss you!
November 5, 2009 at 9:19 am
rossblog
Wow! What a post. But it cost me $1.29 because I couldn’t resist downloading that song on iTunes.
– Bobby
November 5, 2009 at 10:26 am
Connie Willoughby
Tim,
Neil and I watch your journey from “afar” and prayed that you would see and follow God`s lead for your life. It is with great joy that I read todays words from you. You and Kim have had parenting challanges that would put most people in a padded cell. You have met those challanges with Godly class. Colman is a lucky young man to have the two of you to help him navigate this life. I pray that you and Kim will stay firmly on the path and know great joy on the journey.
love, Connie
November 6, 2009 at 4:44 am
diane
tim,
Couldn’t sleep and I just caught up on months (Sept. – present) of your blog. Great stuff. Thanks for sharing and being so transparent about your personal struggles. Also thanks for the reminder that God is so good.
Love you guys.
diane
November 6, 2009 at 10:59 pm
Kristi Byrd
Wow, that was beautiful! What a wonderful testament to your love for your family. Y’all are good folks. Reading this was very humbling, as well. I pray that God continues to bless your family.
January 7, 2010 at 10:23 am
Path of Least Resistance « Thinking Out Loud
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